Eyebrows are one of the striking features that stick out of a face. They come in different shapes too.
But eyebrows are not the possession of everyone. While some have bushy eyebrows, the land is fallow on some people’s faces.
This roast is for folks with arid eyebrows. Dig in.
1. The Surprise Archer Roast
The roast is a pun on the act of drawing in archery. The humor is in becoming an archer due to the lack of eyebrows. Your roast can take the following forms:
Why did the person with no eyebrows become an archer? Because they wanted to draw some attention!
- Why did Greg start archery? He figured it was the only way to draw people’s gaze without eyebrows!
- I heard Sarah took up archery. Maybe now she can finally make an impression with her blank expressions!
2. The Vanishing Act Roast
Get a load of this roast. It is funny and savage. The roast says the person with no eyebrows makes the best magicians.
They can make their eyebrows vanish. It’s no trouble since they don’t have much to begin with.
Why are people with no eyebrows like magicians?
- Have you seen Tom’s new magic trick? He can make his eyebrows disappear!
- Lisa’s so good at magic, that she doesn’t even need a hat to pull off the disappearing act—just a lack of eyebrows!
3. Blank Expressions Roast
Eyebrows are key ingredients in showing surprise. The eyebrows have to rise up the forehead. But since there’s none…
How do you know someone with no eyebrows is surprised? You can read it all over their face… oh wait!
- John was so surprised, you could see it all over his face. Well, except for his eyebrows – they didn’t get the memo.
- I asked Mary if she was shocked, and she said, I’d show you, but my face is missing a key ingredient.
4. The Human Etch A Sketch
In this roast, the face is likened to a limited palette because it lacks eyebrows. Even though it is a true face. The words played on include the palette, the face, and artist. It all comes together in an artistic and humorous way.
What do you call someone with no eyebrows who can draw well?
A true face artist with a limited palette!
- Meet Dave, the human Etch A Sketch. He can draw anything on his face except eyebrows.
- Jill’s so good at drawing, that she can even sketch out her emotions. Too bad anger looks the same as joy on her blank canvas!
5. Eyebrowless Wisdom
The roast here is comparing resilience with the lack of eyebrows. This person has seen a lot of troubles. But it’s hard to tell because he hasn’t raised—nonexistent—eyebrows over his troubles.
Why do people with no eyebrows give great advice?
Because they’ve been through life without a raised eyebrow!
- When you need life advice, go to Joe. He’s been through it all, with a face that says, I’ve seen things—just not with my eyebrows.
- Samantha’s words of wisdom are so profound, you’d think she had eyebrows to raise in approval!
6. The Stealth Walker
This roast is one of the wildest ones on this list. It says the ultimate poker face is the one without eyebrows. It’s almost impossible to read their expressions.
Why did the person with no eyebrows become a ninja?
Because no one can read their expressions—it’s the ultimate poker face!
- Mike joined ninja training. Turns out, a lack of eyebrows is the secret to being an emotionless stealth master.
- Watch out for Emily—she’s a ninja now. No eyebrows, no emotions, just quiet judgment from behind a mask!
7. Browless and Beautiful
Of course. It follows that without eyebrows, that’s one less accessory in your makeup kit to worry about. The humor of the roast is not needed to make up at all.
What’s the advantage of having no eyebrows?
You save money on eyebrow grooming!
- Bob’s on a budget – that’s why he embraced the no-eyebrow look. No more expensive waxing appointments!
- Laura decided to go all-natural. Who needs eyebrows when you can rock the ‘effortlessly bold’ look?
8. The Rainy Day Dilemma
Did you get the twist? Apart from aesthetics, our eyebrows protect our eyeballs from water washing down our face. In this roast, with no eyebrows, it’s as if the rain washes away the expressions.
There’s a twist and play on two ideas here: the protection eyebrows give, and the aesthetic of defining expression.
Why do people with no eyebrows dislike rainy days?
Because they’re tired of their expressions melting away!
- Poor Alex – every time it rains, it’s a battle against gravity. Expressions are sliding off the face again!
- Sara refuses to go out in the rain. She says her face can’t handle another emotional downpour!
9. The Icebreaker
Now here is a direct jab at the lack of eyebrows. There’s a play on the idea of breaking something here. Imagine breaking the ice with a non-existent ax. That’s what the humor is here.
How does someone with no eyebrows break the ice at a party?
They raise their non-existent eyebrows—it’s a conversation starter!
- Mark walked into the party and broke the ice with a raised eyebrow. Well, in his case, it was more of a hopeful forehead lift.
- Lisa’s secret to being the life of the party? A lack of eyebrows that say, I’m here for a good time, not a hairy time!
10. The Symmetry Struggle
In this roast, there is a play on two ideas: expressing symmetry and expressing emotion with the face. For this roast, the two are identical. And apparently, the person with no eyebrows can’t draw both.
Why did the person with no eyebrows give up on symmetry?
Because drawing two identical expressions was just too much effort!
- Ever wonder why Chris’s expressions never match? It’s not inconsistency; it’s just an artistic choice – the asymmetrical charm of no eyebrows!
- Emma tried for hours to draw symmetrical emotions. Eventually, she gave up and embraced the beautifully mismatched look!
11. The Time Saver
Every woman who uses makeup also has a routine for their eyebrows. Some shave their eyebrows off and draw new shapes.
Others shape their eyebrows to give a more defined look. At any rate, eyebrows enjoy individual routines. Without eyebrows, time is saved.
How does having no eyebrows save time in the morning?
No need for those lengthy brow routines!
- Tim decided to sleep an extra 15 minutes every morning. His secret? Skipping the tedious eyebrow maintenance routine!
- Jenny’s morning routine is now a breeze. No more struggling for the perfect arch – just a quick wash and she’s ready to face the day, literally!
12. The Facial Expression Translator
Have you heard of the browless language before? Now you have. Created just for this roast, the idea is that you need an expert in that language to understand the expressions of someone without eyebrows.
What do you call someone who can understand people with no eyebrows?
A facial expression expert—they’ve mastered the art of decoding the browless language!
- Steve is the go-to person for deciphering emotions in the browless community. He’s like the Rosetta Stone of blank faces!
- Sophie became fluent in the language of expression. Now she can tell if someone’s happy, sad, or just forgot to draw on their eyebrows!
13. The Invisible Wig
It is like a substitution of some kind for this roast. Since there’s a lack of eyebrows, she makes it up with wigs. A lack of eyebrows gives her only one look. Wigs help the situation.
Why did the person with no eyebrows start a wig collection?
To experiment with new looks without committing to facial hair!
- Charlie’s wig collection is more extensive than you’d think. He’s got everything from classic brunette to neon pink—all above the eyes, of course!
- Emily decided to change her look daily. One day it’s a bob, the next a curly mane—the possibilities are endless when your canvas is eyebrow-free!
14. The Mystery Actor
The roast here says the person without eyebrows is perfect for the mystery role. Since there’s no expression on their face, they don’t even need a reading audition for the part.
How does someone with no eyebrows audition for a mystery role?
By letting their face be the ultimate enigma!
- John auditioned for the mystery lead. Producers were impressed – his face held more secrets than the entire script!
- Lisa’s new career goal? Becoming the face of suspense. No eyebrows, no spoilers!
15. Rain Check
In this roast, the expressionless face without eyebrows is likened to a lack of rainbows. The eyebrows are rainbows.
There is an intertwine of ideas here. If you love roasts and are familiar with them, you’d get the twist. See the examples below.
Why is it easy to identify someone with no eyebrows during a storm?
They’re the only ones without rainbows on their face!
- Looked like a storm was coming, and sure enough, Dave’s face was the only one without a rainbow.
- During the downpour, we found Tim – the guy with a monochrome face in a sea of vibrant rainbows.
16. Why is it hard to congratulate someone with no eyebrows? Because their success is always a little hard to see!
This roast exaggerates the advantages of having eyebrows. It suggests that without eyebrows, it’s hard to see.
The hilarious joke here is not hard to miss—except you don’t have eyebrows too. Lol. Without eyebrows, handshakes are even invisible.
- I tried to high-five Alex for acing the exam, but it felt more like an invisible handshake.
- Gave Emma a thumbs up for her promotion, but without eyebrows, it was more like a silent cheer.
17. Brow-nana Peel
Why did the person without eyebrows avoid slipping on a banana peel? Because they couldn’t raise an eyebrow at the slippery situation! The twist here is on raising eyebrows at danger. There’s no brows to raise.
- Saw Chris tiptoeing around a banana peel—without eyebrows, his caution was more of a graceful dance.
- Emily narrowly escaped a banana peel, but without eyebrows, her expression remained unaltered.
18. Arch-enemies
The act of raising eyebrows can be called arching. There’s a play on the word arch and archery. To succeed at archery, you need good eyes.
Since there are no eyebrows to arch, this roast suggests that the person is better at archery. As shown in this example:
- Why did the face without eyebrows have no rival in archery? Because it already mastered the art of no arches!
- At the archery range, Jake was a legend—no eyebrows, no archery competition.
- Lisa claimed she hit a bullseye every time—the secret was a face with zero arch-nemesis!”
19. Sneaky Surprises
People without eyebrows always have either a blank expression or a surprised one. This roast is for the latter.
For such a person to pull a surprise party, they have to cover their faces in order not to give themselves away.
- How does someone without eyebrows pull off a surprise party? They keep their emotions under wraps!
- Tried to surprise Mike, but with his perpetually surprised expression, it felt more like a joint celebration.
- Sophie organized a surprise for her friend, but without eyebrows, the secret was almost too well-kept.
20. The Blank Canvas Chronicles
This roast comes with a fictitious book titled Browless. It’s the title of a book that someone without an eyebrow would write.
Apparently it’s a big deal to have lived life without eyebrows and generations unborn needs to know about it.
- What’s the autobiography of someone without eyebrows called? Browless: Painting Life’s Canvas Without Arches.
- Caught Amy reading ‘Browless’ at the park—turns out, that living without eyebrows makes for a compelling story.
- John recommended ‘Browless’ as the most gripping autobiography he’d ever read—who knew a lack of eyebrows could be so riveting!
Eyebrows add a unique flair to our expressions, so imagine a world without them! Embrace the humor in brow-less situations with these roasts that are sure to tickle your funny bone.
Remember to keep it civil during your roasts. The aim is to make people laugh and have fun. More love. Less wars.
