The sight of a bad haircut is itself a hilarious joke, however knowing to roast someone with a bad haircut is a quality skill that not everyone possesses.
Do you wish to get at or tease your pal, sibling, buddy, or colleague who just had a bad haircut in a funny and light-hearted roast? Relax! I got you.
I have cooked the best funny roasts, savage roasts, classic comebacks, light-hearted jokes, and dark humor to use for someone with a bad haircut.
I have got you covered with a good range of interesting roasts that strike hard and will also get you ahead in the roast game. Keep reading!
Here are 20 Roasts For Someone with a Bad Haircut
- Did your barber use a lawnmower instead of clippers for that haircut?
- I’ve seen better haircuts on a scarecrow – at least they can pull off the messy look naturally.
- Is your hairstylist a fan of abstract art? Because your hair looks like a failed masterpiece.
- I hope your hairstylist has a backup career option – perhaps in hiding.
- Your haircut is so off, it’s like your hairstylist was playing darts blindfolded.
- Bad haircut and a good sense of humor.
- Bad haircut and bad day.
- Your haircut is so bad, that even Google Maps can’t find a route to redemption.
- Your haircut is so uneven; it’s like Picasso decided to dabble in hairstyling.”
- I hope you have a hat collection because that’s the only way to save this haircut.
- Tell me what you owe the barber this time around.
- Thank God I can save money by watching Nat Geo Wild on your head.
- The closer you get to me, the more you look like a human broccoli.
- You must owe your barber a dessert to give you a desert encroachment on your head.
- We might have to grill the rest of the scattered hair on your head to save us some embarrassment.
- With that cut, my grandpa will be jealous of you right now.
- Take a portrait of you now with the new haircut that is you in 50 years’ time.
- Whatever happened don’t tell me you had your bath with hair remover.
- I hope you kept the receipt for that haircut; you might want a refund.
- I’ve seen smoother transitions in a kindergarten art class – did your stylist use safety scissors?”
Did your barber use a lawnmower instead of clippers for that haircut?
You are in the room with some of your guys and then your friend walks in looking very funny with his new haircut. Be the first to make a cool joke out of the amusing scene with this funny roast.
I bet your barber uses a lawnmower instead of clippers for that haircut is a humorous way to tease the haphazard haircut on their head. It shows their haircut lacks the precision and finesse of a good hairstylist.
Tease your friend this way:
- Your hair looks like it got in a fight with the lawnmower, and the lawnmower won.
- Your barber tried out new tools on your head. Which did he use for your haircut? Lawnmower, I guess.
I’ve seen better haircuts on a scarecrow – at least they can pull off the messy look naturally.
Did your colleague on a Monday morning with a bad haircut and a shirt on trousers appear gingerly in the office; don’t make him grab a seat before making his butt roast with this savage roast.
This roast in a savage manner compares their haircut to that of a scarecrow’s which is always messy and unkempt, and further plays on the idea that even the scarecrow’s haircut has a neater outlook than theirs.
Here are some examples :
- I need to sue your barber for giving you a scarecrow haircut… oh! Wait, even the scarecrow’s haircut is better than yours.
- Looking at your haircut I think a scarecrow has better trims.
Is your hairstylist a fan of abstract art? Because your hair looks like a failed masterpiece.
“Is your hairstylist a fan of abstract art? Because your hair looks like a failed masterpiece” is another funny way to get at someone with a bad haircut.
It is a sarcastic approach to describe how ugly the hairstyle is. Also referring to their hair as a failed masterpiece implies that they are looking their worst with that bad haircut.
Here are some examples:
- Your hair can be used as a prototype for a bad haircut magazine.
- Your hair looks like a failed masterpiece.
I hope your hairstylist has a backup career option – perhaps in hiding
Roasting your friend with a bad haircut isn’t enough. Increase the depth of fun by roasting the hairstylist too with this funny roast.
With this light joke, you are implying that your friend’s hairstylist lacks skills which resulted in a poorly executed haircut.
Check this example:
- I will advise your hair stylist to pick a double major in Carpentry. Barbing isn’t meant for him.
Your haircut is so off, it’s like your hairstylist was playing darts blindfolded.
Use this humor-filled roast to get at someone with a bad haircut and sit back to enjoy the scene. If your friend is such that gets hit by roast, he will get the gist that his hair is in a very bad shape and he will soon be on the lookout for a face call to hide the shame.
Here are some examples:
- I guess your barber was sleeping at intervals when he was barbing your hair.
- Your barber will be good at hide and seek. Your hairstyle pinpoints that.
Bad haircut and a good sense of humor
The sight of a bad haircut is capable of evoking laughter even without saying a word. If you have a friend with a bad haircut and he is the boring type, roast him by saying this:
- Luke’s good sense of humor is in his bad haircut. Look, he is making everyone laugh without uttering a word.
- Lucky for you; You will be getting a comedian gig with this haircut.
Bad haircut and bad day
People with bad haircuts usually have a bad day, and are grumpy from the displeasure of their haircut. This roast draws inspiration from this observation.
You can start your roast using the interrogation method like this:
- Why does Jude have a bad day? Because of his bad haircut.
- Why is Thomas grumpy all day? Because of his bad haircut.
Your haircut is so bad, that even Google Maps can’t find a route to redemption.
“Your haircut is so bad that even Google Maps can’t find a route to redemption” is another way to roast someone with a bad haircut.
These exaggerated lines help you convey the message that their haircut is damaged beyond restoration.
Here is an example:
- Your haircut is so bad that even Google Maps would struggle to find a way to fix it.
Your haircut is so uneven; it’s like Picasso decided to dabble in hairstyling.
Imagine a bricklayer barbing your hair. Now imagine a painter boarding your hair? It will never have that perfection or precision of a professional barber.
“Your haircut is so uneven; it’s like Picasso decided to dabble in hairstyling” is just you trying to tell someone they have a messy haircut in such an exaggerated way that will arouse laughter from everyone present there.
Here is the best way to deliver your roast:
- Your haircut looks like a failed masterpiece of Picasso; it lacks aesthetic appeal.
I hope you have a hat collection because that’s the only way to save this haircut
“I hope you have a hat collection because that’s the only way to save this haircut” is a stylish way of telling someone with a bad haircut that their hair is so embarrassing and they will need a hat wherever they go, to save the shame.
Deliver the roast professionally in this manner:
- There is a need to shop for different headgear. Your haircut needs proper closure for healing.
Tell me what you owe the barber this time around
Roast your friend with this one-liner by playfully teasing them that the reason for their bad haircut is that they owe the barber a lot of money or other valuables.
Here are some examples of how to deliver your roast:
- Looking at your haircut, I will assume you underpaid your barber.
- So sad your barber finally took his revenge on the debts you owe him with your hair.
Thank God I can save money by watching Nat Geo Wild on your head
Tell your friend indirectly that their bad haircut makes them look crazy or look like they have been in a fight with wild animals, with this funny roast.
This is one classic roast they won’t forget for a long period of time. Also, this roast stresses how unattractive they look with the bad haircut.
Here are some examples:
- What is this on your hair? Did you fight with a lion?
- You remind me of a llama that just left the zoo.
The closer you get to me, the more you look like a human broccoli
Use this one-liner to roast your friend in a very friendly manner. This statement implies that they are having a funny look with their bad haircut.
Roast your friend in this way:
- Did your barber get inspiration from broccoli? You look like a human broccoli.
- Is your new haircut called broccoli hairstyle?
You must owe your barber a dessert to give you a desert encroachment on your head
You must owe your barber a dessert to give you a desert encroachment on your head is another thing to say to someone with a bad haircut.
This is a hilarious pun to get at someone who has a bad haircut. Also comparing their hair to desert is something that slaps.
Here is the best way to roast:
- Why does your hair look like a desert encroachment; guess you owe your barber dessert.
We might have to grill the rest of the scattered hair on your head to save us some embarrassment
Grill, then finally roast your friend with a bad haircut with this humorous statement.
This is a punchline that will perfectly roast someone with a bad haircut and send everyone into laughing mode.
Check this example:
- Why is Derrick’s hair looking like wet chicken hair? Let’s grill it to save us some embarrassment.
With that cut, my grandpa will be jealous of you right now
Again, this is another comical roast for someone with a bad haircut. You can playfully touch the bad part of the haircut and say:
- My grandpa will be jealous of you in his grave. It took him 70 years of age to achieve this haircut
Take a portrait of you now with the new haircut that is you in 60 years’ time.
“Take a portrait of you now with the new haircut that is you in 50 years’ time” is another statement to make fun of someone with a bad haircut.
Only just be prepared for a roast fight with this one-liner:
- I think your barber is in a hurry to see what you look like in your 60s.
Whatever happened don’t tell me you had your bath with hair remover
If you have a very inquisitive sibling who has a bad haircut, “whatever happened don’t tell me you had your bath with hair remover” is an iconic way to roast them.
This statement implies that perhaps curiosity gave them a good kick in the head; hence the bad haircut!
Check this example:
- Did you use hair remover to remove your hair as part of your silly experiment?
I hope you kept the receipt for that haircut; you might want a refund
Someone with a bad haircut ought to get a refund from their hairstylist for abusing their head in such a manner.
Tease your friend to the point of them getting motivated to get a refund from their stylist, with this roast.
Check this example:
- A refund is what you should be thinking of now. Your hair has a lot of unsubscribed drama.
I’ve seen smoother transitions in a kindergarten art class – did your stylist use safety scissors?
The last on the list is this funny line you can use to roast someone with a bad haircut.
This joke highlights the lack of ability in the haircut’s execution by implying that the transitions are as crude as those found in a kindergarten art class.
To Wrap it Up
For a good chuckle, there are several ways to poke fun at someone who has a bad haircut.
Use the aforementioned instances that are relatable to make fun of your friends who have bad haircuts and make them laugh.