20 Funny Roasts for Someone Named Jonathan 

Funny Roasts for Someone Named Jonathan 

Do you need funny roasts for someone named Jonathan? 

Jonathan is a beautiful name. Many famous people bear the name; from the likes of Jonathan Ross, and Jonathan Winters to Jonathan Owens. And there was Jonathan in the Bible, the son of Saul.

So, if you know someone with that name, you might want to tease them. Fortunately, this post is all about funny insults for someone named Jonathan. Keep reading.

20 Funny Roasts for Someone Named Jonathan 

If you want to make fun of someone named Jonathan, there are plenty of ways to do so. From creative one-liners to hilarious comparisons, there’s just something to tease about that person.

Some examples include: “Jonathans are hardworking, but you are the laziest person I have ever met,” “Why did Jonathan bring a ladder to school?

He wanted to climb his way to success,” and “What’s the difference between you and Jonathan Owens? He knew how to use his hands” 

Here are 20 hilarious insults for someone named Jonathan:

  1. Jonathans are hardworking, but you are the laziest person I have ever met
  2. You’re not royal neither are you loyal, you’re just local
  3. What’s the difference between you and Jonathan in the Bible? He was trustworthy
  4. What’s the difference between you and Jonathan Ross? He knows how to make us laugh
  5. Why did Jonathan bring a ladder to school? He wanted to climb his way to success
  6. Your father named you Jonathan because God was tired of having you and gave you to them
  7. Jonathan brought a paintbrush to school. He said he wanted to brush up his skills 
  8. Jonathan brought a ladder to the party because he heard the drinks were on the house
  9. What’s the difference between you and Jonathan Owens? He knows how to use his hands
  10. I don’t know why you were named Jonathan, you’ve got zero talent
  11. Jonathans must be great at hide and seek. I’m yet to find your gift 
  12. You should go to the lighthouse daily. Maybe a light will shine on your path, Jonathan 
  13. I’ve never met a Jonathan so dull like you
  14. Your parents named you Jonathan because you’re their greatest regret
  15. You’re Jonathan, wow! Do your parents know you’re going to betray them?
  16. You should apologize to all Jonathans for answering their name
  17. You’re not smart for your name
  18. Your name is prettier than you
  19. You’ve got a cute name, but unfortunately, your personality is ugly
  20. You are Jonathan! Your parents must have made a mistake

Jonathans Are Hardworking, But You Are the Laziest Person I Have Ever Met

Use this unique punchline to roast someone named Jonathan.

This comparison will work well for someone who’s particularly lazy or avoids doing some things. You can seize a roast duel to call them out for their slothfulness.

Also, it’ll be suitable to use when you ask them to do something and they refuse. Whether you’ve met a Jonathan or not, they’ll surely not know.

  • You’re just too lazy. You can’t even model your namesakes
  • You’re too lazy, you’re disgracing Jonathans’ legacy 

You’re Not Royal Neither Are You Loyal, You’re Just Local

“You’re not royal neither are you loyal, you’re just local” is another classic line you can use to tease someone named Jonathan.

This is a hilarious statement that refers to Jonathan in the Bible. Jonathan was the son of King Saul, but he was loyal to David because he was the chosen king. 

So, this line taunts them by implying that they’re disloyal even when they’re not royal. Also, calling them local makes it funnier. It’s a play on words they won’t forget for a long time. 

What’s the Difference Between You and Jonathan in the Bible? He Was Trustworthy

Another interesting comparison you can use to taunt someone named Jonathan is by referring to Jonathan’s loyalty to David in the Bible.

By saying that Jonathan’s trust makes him different from them directly calls them untrustworthy. It’s a funny way of describing them and will work perfectly during a roast duel.

What’s the Difference Between You and Jonathan Ross? He Knows How to Make Us Laugh

Comparing someone named Jonathan to Jonathan Ross is another hilarious way to poke fun at them.

First, Jonathan Ross is a British broadcaster and a comedian amongst other things. So, you can use this line to compare them to Jonathan Ross by calling out their lack of sense of humor. 

It’ll work adequately for someone who doesn’t know how to joke or take a joke. 

  • You should learn a little bit of humor from Jonathan Ross after all he’s your namesake
  • Your lack of humor is killing. Why can’t you be like Jonathan Ross?

Why Did Jonathan Bring a Ladder to School? He Wanted to Climb His Way to Success

You can tease someone named Jonathan by creatively creating a silly joke they wouldn’t see coming. 

Using this classic punchline will surely take them unawares. It’ll work well during a roast duel to make a clapback difficult. 

Emphasizing that they brought a ladder to school to climb their way to success implies that they’re unsuccessful. They will surely look for what to say in return.

  • I saw you with a ladder this morning, are you trying to climb your way to success?
  • You’ll surely need a ladder to step up to success 

Your Father Named You Jonathan Because God Was Tired of Having You and Gave You to Them 

Another hilarious way to come for someone named Jonathan is by referring to the meaning of the name.

Jonathan is a Hebrew name that means God’s gift or God has given. So, this iconic one-liner will surely sting, as it emphasizes the meaning of their name.

Moreover, suggesting that God must have been tired of them can express how you feel about them.

  • God gave you to your parents because he was tired of having you around. I’m sure your parents are already getting tired
  • Your parents will soon give you out like God gave you out 

Jonathan Brought a Paintbrush to School. He Said He Wanted to Brush Up His Skills 

Another interesting joke you can throw at someone named Jonathan is with this crazy punchline.

Using this line during a casual conversation will surely cause some uproar. It’s a stinging remark they wouldn’t see coming.

Also, you can try this one-liner if Jonathan loves to paint. It’ll surely hit close to home.

Jonathan Brought a Ladder to the Party Because He Heard the Drinks Were on the House

This joke is another crazy thing you can say to tease someone named Jonathan.

It’ll work adequately during a party or social gathering. Imagine throwing this shade out of the blue when you gather with friends.

It’ll certainly throw everyone in fits of laughter. Also, it’ll work well if they like free drinks, as it teases them for that trait. They’ll surely find nothing to say in return.

What’s the Difference Between You and Jonathan Owens? He Knows How to Use His Hands

Another interesting comparison you can use to roast someone named Jonathan is comparing them to Jonathan Owens.

Jonathan Owens is an American footballer who currently plays for the Green Bay Packers.

So, you can use this line to stylishly insult them, implying that they’ve got no skill or don’t know how to use their hands meaningfully.

I Don’t Know Why You Were Named Jonathan, You’ve Got Zero Talent 

“I don’t know why you were named Jonathan, you’ve got zero talent” is another amusing remark you can make to someone named Jonathan.

Using this one-liner on them implies that you expect them to be talented since their name is Jonathan.

It’s a funny comparison that expresses your disappointment at them bearing their name. Also, it’s a funny way to insult them.

  • You’re a disgrace to Jonathans. They all have talents
  • You should change your name. You’ve got no talent 

Jonathans Must Be Great at Hide and Seek. I’m Yet to Find Your Gift 

“Jonathans must be great at hide and seek. I’m yet to find your gift” is another interesting way to make fun of someone named Jonathan.

This line just like the above roasts them for having no talent. It’s a funny way to insult them effortlessly. Also, it’ll work well during a roast duel, as it doesn’t only poke fun at them, it also insults the name.

You Should Go to the Lighthouse Daily. Maybe a Light Will Shine on Your Path, Jonathan 

“You should go to the lighthouse daily. Maybe a light will shine on your path, Jonathan” is another thing you can say to someone whose name is Jonathan to roast them.

This is a savage remark you can make directly to them during a roast duel. Giving this response to their roast will surely take them off balance.

Additionally, it’s a funny way to show that their insults didn’t get to you while insulting them effortlessly. 

I’ve Never Met a Jonathan So Dull Like You 

 Funny Roasts for Someone Named Jonathan 

Another thing to say to someone named Jonathan to tease them is, “I’ve never met a Jonathan so dull like you.”

This is another humorous comparison that’ll certainly hit hard. Also, it’ll work well after they do something wrong.

Whether you’ve met a Jonathan or not, telling them that they’re not as bright as other Jonathans is a perfect way to roast them.

  • Why is your Jonathan different? You’re too dull
  • Jonathans are not these dull. I’m surprised 

Your Parents Named You Jonathan Because You’re Their Greatest Regret

Another way you can make fun of someone named Jonathan is with this iconic one-liner that involves their parents.

Saying that their name was given out of regret is a savage remark that’ll hit hard. It’ll work well during a roast battle, as it doesn’t only insult their person and the name, it also throws shade at their parents.

 Funny Roasts for Someone Named Jonathan 

You’re Jonathan, Wow! Do Your Parents Know You’re Going to Betray Them?

Another crazy roast to try with someone named Jonathan is by referring to Jonathan’s betrayal of his father Saul in the Bible.

While Jonathan is seen as a righteous man who was loyal to David, on the other hand, he betrayed his parents, King Saul, who was against David.

So, you can use this line to tease them, implying that they’re probably going to betray their parents too.

You Should Apologize to All Jonathans for Answering Their Name

You can roast someone named Jonathan by suggesting that they’re not fit to answer the name.

It’s another exciting way to get to them. This hilarious suggestion can work when they introduce themselves, as it implies that from what you’ve seen they’re not fit to bear the name.

Also, it can work well when they do something wrong or during a roast battle.

  • Wow! So you’re Jonathan. You owe every Jonathan an apology, you’re not fit to answer that name
  • You shouldn’t be Jonathan at all. Your parents didn’t name you well

You’re Not Smart for Your Name 

“You’re not smart for your name” is a simple yet iconic punchline you can use to jest someone named Jonathan.

This is another crazy line that suggests that they’re not fit to bear the name. It implies Jonathans are meant to be smart. So, it’s a humorous way to call them dumb. 

Your Name Is Prettier Than You 

 Funny Roasts for Someone Named Jonathan 

“Your name is prettier than you” is another thing you can say to someone named Jonathan to roast them.

This is another suggestion that they’re not fit to answer the name. Also, this is a funny way of calling them ugly. 

Moreover, comparing their beauty to their name makes it funnier, as it praises their name while insulting them.

You’ve Got a Cute Name, But Unfortunately, Your Personality Is Ugly 

This is another interesting line that praises the name, Jonathan, but attacks the bearer.

Also, it’s a humorous roast line you can use when they act badly. Saying they’ve got a pretty name but an ugly personality emphasizes that they’re not fit to bear the name.

You Are Jonathan! Your Parents Must Have Made a Mistake 

This is another funny way to respond to someone when they introduce themselves as Jonathan.

It’s a crazy punchline you can use to roast them by implying that the name doesn’t suit them.

Also, emphasizing that their parents must have made a mistake makes it more amusing.

Takeaway

If you know someone who answers Jonathan, and you want to roast them, you don’t have to look far.

You only have to use the above examples to dish out hilarious sassy lines to get everyone in fits of laughter. So, feel free to always refer to this article when needed.

 

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