The best comeback to give when someone calls you a pervert will depend on the situation. The person didn’t just use such demoralizing words on you for no reason.
They must have called you that after seeing either your body language, spoken words, eye movement, or rude gestures. But in some cases, they may be overreacting.
What does it mean when someone calls you a pervert? It means they think you’re behaving in a way that’s not okay, especially sexually or inappropriately, such as doing something weird or creepy.
Your response depends on the person, too. To your partner in bed? You can say, “Only for you, baby.” To your neighbor? A comeback like “You’re the one opening the windows” works well.
In the rest of this article, you will learn other nice comebacks to use in this situation.
List of the Best 20 Comebacks for When You’re Called a Pervert
Remember, the comeback option you eventually go with will depend on the case and the person who have called you such.
But many of these recommendations will work for almost any situation:
1. Excuse me, ma’am, But I think you think too highly of yourself
When someone calls you a pervert, one of the best responses you can give as a comeback is, “Excuse me, ma’am, But I think you think too highly of yourself.”
This allows you to turn over the situation and make them become the pariah. It shows that they are the ones exaggerating the problem and trying to feel special simply because you made a gesture towards them.
It works for every situation, and it’s a very humbling comeback. Here are other ways you can even put it:
- The only way you can feel important is to make me look like I’m moving into you. Sad.
2. Looks like someone’s projecting.
“Looks like someone’s projecting” is another innovative way to respond when someone calls you a pervert.
I love this response because it works for EVERY situation when someone uses a demoralizing word on you.
By saying they’re projecting, it immediately makes them the star of the conversation (in a negative way).
Naturally, people project who they are on others. So, you are using that to twist the situation psychologically.
- Not everyone is like you
- You’re the pervert here. Don’t assume everyone’s like you.
3. It takes one to know one
If you want to respond snappy and unbothered when someone calls you a pervert, you can say, “It takes one to know one.”
This will make it look like the person is also as bad as they are thinking you are. I don’t like this comeback so much because it has an element of accepting you’re a pervert.
But I recommend it for a situation where you’ve been called a pervert on a lighter note, and you just need to say something not to look defeated.
- Pot calling the kettle black
- Look at who that’s coming from. The pervert herself (or himself)
4. Did you run out of insults from the playground?
Another witty comeback you can say when you’re called a pervert is, “Did you run out of insults from the playground?”
The idea of playground insults is that they are petty because these are one-liners traditionally used by children against one another.
So, by associating the situation with a playground insult, it simply means they’re childish, and calling you a pervert was unnecessary in that situation.
- You’re just being childish. Unbelievable!
- Is that your way of expressing pettiness?
5. I’d roast you, but my mom said I’m not allowed to burn trash.
Sometimes, when called a pervert wrongly, the best you can do is ignore the person. But you can do that by dropping a comeback – “I’d roast you, but my mom said I’m not allowed to burn trash.”
Now, it’s a tricky thing to bring your mom when trying to diss someone because it presents them an opportunity to provide a counter comeback.
But here, it works fine because all you need to do is drop the bomb and leave that place. Alternatively, you can put it this way:
- You call me a pervert, but I’ll be one only if I try to act like you.
6. Sorry, I don’t speak loser.
The “Sorry, I don’t speak loser” comeback is a classic safety net for whenever you’re called harsh things, such as a pervert. So it will work well in any situation.
Once the person uses such words, just call them a loser. No more words. It’s a simple and lazy way to diss the person while responding.
- Says the loser
- Me? Pervert? I thought you were just a loser, but I can see you’re a hopeless loser.
7. I’m sorry; I didn’t realize I needed your approval.
Sometimes, people call you a pervert, even when you do things that are otherwise considered normal.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I needed your approval” is one of the best comebacks for when someone calls you a pervert.
I like this response because it helps to show you’re unfazed by whatever harsh words they use to make you feel like a wrong person.
- You must have mistaken me for someone who cares about your opinion.
8. You’re the pervert here
“You’re the pervert here” is a straightforward comeback for when someone calls you a pervert. In not every situation, you have to sound creative or witty when giving a response.
Being called a pervert, especially in public, is seriously demoralizing. And if you take it seriously, then you can directly call the person out for using that word on you and make them look like the wrong person.
- I’m not. You are.
- Don’t you call me that? Not everyone is a pervert like you.
9. I’m not arguing with you; I’m just explaining why you’re wrong.
Trust me, you can make someone look stupid by simply being cool, calm, and calculated as they throw harsh words at you.
“I’m not arguing with you; I’m just explaining why you’re wrong” is one of the mature comebacks to give when someone calls you a pervert. It makes them realize that they’ve overreacted.
- Why are you overreacting?
- There you go again, making a situation out of everything.
10. Oh, bless your heart.
“Oh, bless your heart” is an intelligent way to respond when someone calls you a comeback because it first shows you’re unfazed about the insult.
But again, the use of “bless” has a keep-it-holy undertone, which will sharply contradict what the person is trying to paint you as.
Use this line for when words fail you. The person may even feel defeated when they see you’re not trying to debunk their allegations.
- May the good Lord forgive you.
- Bless you, sister (brother)
11. Are you always this dense, or are you making a special effort today?
You can say, “Are you always this dense, or are you making a special effort today?”
I have recommended this line to several readers who email me for recommendations, and the feedback is always that it worked.
12. Says Who? You?
When you question who the statement is coming from, it sends the impression that they are perverts, so it’s a pot-calling-kettle-black situation.
You can easily remember this one. It paints them as the wrong person here, and it ejects you from the banter.
- See who’s calling another a pervert
- You’re not all that holy yourself
13. I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
Another creative comeback to use when someone calls you a pervert is, “I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person.”
It immediately makes the person feel inferior and shows you’re mature enough not to touch the need to defend yourself.
14. Your vibe is giving me a migraine.
There’s nothing as wrong as being seen as bad energy. When someone calls you a pervert, you can tell them, “Your vibe is giving me a migraine.”
Think about it: Scientifically, the headache phase of a migraine usually lasts at least four hours, according to Cleveland Clinic. So, it implies that the person’s vibe, even for as short as four hours, is unbearable.
It’s a burn.
15. It’s incredible how you can still talk with your head so far up your…
Another fantastic comeback for when someone calls you a pervert is, “It’s amazing how you can still talk with your head so far up your…”
The exciting thing about this line is that it starts with “it’s amazing,” which may initially not look like you’re about to say someone harsh in return.
But then saying they can still talk with their head so far up ‘arse’ means they think so highly of themselves, according to Urban Dictionary.
It’s an excellent way to call them out for being arrogant or have such a high opinion of themselves that they can’t see what an utter tit.
16. Do you ever wonder what life is like for ordinary people?
It means they are not typical to use such harsh words on you unnecessarily.
- You’re not typical of what you just said.
17. Chill, why the drama?
When someone calls you a pervert, they may have done that just by simply overreacting or aggravating a situation needlessly.
You can say, “Chill, why the drama?” as a comeback in such a situation.
It makes them realize that, indeed, they didn’t have to have used that word on you and that your action isn’t that offensive to be called a pervert.
18. Now, I’m sure you just have bad luck when it comes to thinking.
Another way to put someone in their place when they call you a pervert is to say they have bad luck when it comes to thinking.
The critical thing about this comeback is that it psychologically paints the idea that they don’t think appropriately before saying something about people.
This automatically renders whatever they claim about you false.
It also shows you’re unbothered about their opinion of you.
I totally recommend this comeback in any situation.
19. You’re the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard.
“You’re the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard” is one of the most brilliant things you can say in return when someone calls you a pervert. A gene pool are genes present in a reproducing population or species.
So, it’s an intelligent and indirect way of saying their existence is a mistake. It is a flat-out attack, so you’re not making any reference to the initial term they called you.
It’s an intelligent way to take the whole conversation to another topic.
20. I’m not.
Sometimes, when trying to debunk someone who calls you a pervert, you need to be severe and direct with your response.
Instead of trying to sound intelligent and witty, simply make it clear that you’re not a pervert. Let it sink in.
“I’m not” does not sound like the comeback you want to hear, but it’s a practical thing to say when someone associates you with a demoralizing remark.
- I’m not a pervert.
- Don’t you ever call me that
Remember to Look Inwards
While it’s nice to have a bunch of sassy things to say in response when called a pervert, you also need to do some self-reflection after being called a pervert.
If someone tells you something like that, think about what you might be doing that’s not right.
Are you showing it in your body language, the way you talk, or how you look at them? Maybe you’re using rude gestures.
Figure out what’s causing this reaction, take a good look at yourself, and fix it.
Once you’re behaving better, people will forget about what happened before.
It’s all about changing for the better, my friend!