Roasting a Greek person would mostly have to do with tying the situation of the country or her history with a funny aspect of the person.
One of my go-to punchlines to piss off a Greek in a funny way is, “Your skin is in a worse state than the Greek economy.” It’s a burn, but it doesn’t work for every situation.
In this article, I will show you 20 sassy things you can do to roast a Greek and examples of sentences that can help you incorporate these punchlines into your conversation with them.
List of 20 Ways To Roast A Greek
The best one to use depends on how related you are to the Greek person. But generally, you can’t go wrong with any of these ideas:
1. Confuse modern and ancient Greece
The Greeks of today have evolved big time from those toga-wearing philosophers.
Of course, they cherish their heritage, but when you intentionally assume that the Greek person still worships Olympian gods or lives in mini-Parthenons, they could get pissed off in a lighthearted manner.
It’s a sly way to tell them they don’t exist in the 21st century. Here are some ideas on how to say it:
- What gods do you worship?
- Tell me about the mini-parthenons you Greek people live in. I’m curious
2. Tell them they deserved the crises
Greeks take a lot of pride in their history and contributions to the world, so saying they deserved the crisis hits them where it hurts.
The economic problems were challenging for Greece, and saying they deserved it is like blaming them for something they didn’t want or choose.
You’re likely to get a fiery response, but isn’t that the goal? To hit the nerve? Here are some ideas on how to say it:
- Hey, maybe if Greece had a “Financial Crisis Olympics,” you’d finally clinch that gold medal!
- Did someone say “Deserve a Crisis” award? Greece, you’re a real contender!
- Attempt your version of traditional Greek dancing at a social event
- Imagine you, with no prior experience, attempting these intricate dance steps. To a Greek person, it’s like watching someone try to copy a famous singer but hitting all the wrong notes.
- The dance is more than just moving your feet; it’s a way for Greeks to connect with their history and have a good time.
- Your attempt might seem like you’re making a playful mockery of something they hold dear. It’s not that they’ll get angry; they might just find it a bit cringe-worthy or comical.
- “Watch out, folks! My dance moves are so ancient, even Zeus would ask for a refund on lightning bolts!”
4. Be curious about their encounters with mythical creatures like centaurs or minotaurs
See, for Greeks, these myths aren’t just bedtime stories. It’s like their ancient reality show with dramatic centaur feuds and maze escapades with the Minotaur.
Imagine you’re at a chill party, and someone brings up that cringe-worthy thing you did years ago. That’s how the Greeks might feel.
When you ask, it’s as if you’re saying, “Hey, Greeks, remember when your ancestors had these wild adventures?” It’s like turning their extraordinary stories into a drama series.
- You’re Greek, eh? So, how did you encounter the centaurs or minotaurs? Or you never did?
5. Try to balance a stack of plates on your arm, asking if it’s an ordinary skill in their culture.
Imagine you try to balance plates on your arm and ask if it’s an ordinary skill in their culture. This could make them feel like you’re making fun of their traditional plate smashing, something they take a lot of pride in.
- “Do you guys still smash plates, or have you upgraded to plate balancing?”
- Plate smashing is the only exciting thing I know about you guys; I suppose there’s plate balancing as well.
6. Compliment them using exaggerated references to Greek gods
Imagine complimenting a Greek person by saying they’re as wise as Athena, strong as Hercules, and as beautiful as Aphrodite.
It might seem like a fun compliment, but it could backfire. In the end, it’s like complimenting a modern person by comparing them to legendary figures from a time gone by.
It might not come across as flattering, and they might prefer compliments that acknowledge who they are today without the ancient Greek twist.
7. Gift them a small decorative display of broken plates
Greeks love smashing plates in celebration, so your gift might make them think you’re teasing them about their lively nature or suggesting their parties are a bit too rowdy.
It’s a playful tease, but it might come off as a jab at their habits. You’ve chosen a gift that plays on cultural stereotypes. In the present, you can add notes saying:
- “I thought your home could use some authentic Greek décor.:
- “Now, every meal can feel like a celebration.”
8. Tell them you spotted a cyclops or a gorgon in the neighborhood and ask if they’ve encountered any.
Telling a Greek person you’ve seen a Cyclops or Gorgon in the neighborhood is like saying their cultural history is a joke. They might not take it well because it feels like you’re teasing their heritage.
- “Hey, did you borrow Hercules’ glasses? I swear I spotted a cyclops in the neighborhood, but maybe it’s just your everyday one-eyed neighbor!”
- “I was walking around and thought I stumbled into Mount Olympus when I saw a gorgon nearby. Do you guys often have mythological creatures for neighbors?”
9. Raise a glass of water and propose a toast with “ouzo,” pretending it’s the real deal, and see their reaction.
Ouzo is like a superstar in the beverage world – a symbol of their culture and pride. It’s like showing up to a costume party with a bedsheet ghost outfit while others are dressed to the nines.
Greeks take their drinks seriously, and this move would be like saying, “Hey, I know your beloved ouzo so well that I can’t even tell it apart from water!”
- “Here’s to my ouzo – as clear as my misguided attempt at blending in with Greek sophistication!”
10. Craft a paper crown resembling the Acropolis and present it to them
The Acropolis is a big deal in Greek history, a symbol of their ancient achievements. Making a paper crown version might come across as making fun of something they’re really proud of.
Even though you might just be trying to be playful, to them, it could feel like you’re not taking their heritage seriously.
- “Thought the Acropolis could use a stylish upgrade – paper beats marble any day, right?”
- “Presenting the Acropolis 2.0: now in DIY paper chic. You’re welcome!”
11. Pretend to be a Greek Sphinx and challenge them with humorous riddles
As you play this Sphinx role and throw amusing riddles at them, it’s like challenging the most brilliant minds of ancient Greece.
At first, they might find it funny, but be cautious! Your jokes might be seen as trying to outsmart the intelligent people who once lived there.
- “If Hera needed a new PR agent, she’d probably hire you – your wit is as sharp as her jealousy!”
12. Drop quotes from the movie “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” into your conversation
Imagine you’re discussing Greek culture and suddenly throw in a quote like, “Put some Windex on it!” That’s like saying, “I’ve only seen one movie about Greece, and now I’m an expert!”
Using these quotes might make it seem like you’re oversimplifying and stereotyping their rich culture for a quick laugh.
Be mindful of using these quotes. You wouldn’t want to turn a friendly chat into a cringe-worthy moment for your Greek friend – except you want to! Winks*
- “Your family gatherings are so lively; I half-expect someone to yell ‘Put some Windex on it!’ when things get messy!”
- “Your loud family parties make the Portokalos clan look like a silent meditation retreat – Opa!
13. Pretend to be struck by a lightning bolt (Zeus-style) when they make an impressive statement or accomplishment.
Maybe the Greek person is excitedly sharing their achievements, feeling like a hero from ancient stories.
They’re proud and happy about what they’ve done. Now, if you pretend to be struck by a lightning bolt (like Zeus, the king of gods) when they talk, it’s like saying, “What you did is not impressive at all, compared to the power of the gods.”
It means you’re making a joke about someone’s success, and they might not find it funny. To make it a roast, you could say:
- “Well, looks like even Zeus would need sunglasses to handle the shine from your achievements!”
- “If I were you, I’d ask Hera for some advice on handling such epic success – she’s been dealing with divine overachievement for centuries!”
14. Mix up Greek mythology and real life, like calling them the “Hercules of the office.”
Saying someone has Herculean tasks might unintentionally suggest their job is a constant struggle, not exactly the vibe you’d want in an office chat.
Do you get the picture now?
While you might think it’s a compliment, it could be taken the wrong way. That’s the goal. To roast them.
- “Looks like you’re pulling a Sisyphean stunt with that never-ending to-do list – Hercules would be impressed!”
- “If tackling meetings were a mythical beast, you’d be the office Hercules, wielding a pen instead of a sword.”
15. Mess up their pronunciation intentionally
Okay, imagine you’re at a fancy party, and the host is serving a dish called “gyro.” Now, instead of saying it correctly like “yee-ro,” you deliberately mispronounce it like “jee-ro.”
Intentionally messing up the pronunciation will piss them off when they realize you’re doing it over and over again to roast them,
16. Tell them Greece is an evil summer destination
Telling a Greek person that Greece is an evil summer destination is a surefire way to get them riled up.
Greeks are fiercely proud of their country, especially during the summer when the beaches, ancient ruins, and tasty cuisine make it a hotspot for vacationers.
So, dissing Greece as a summer destination is like challenging a friend’s favorite thing – it’s bound to raise some eyebrows and probably start a friendly debate, but don’t expect them to agree with you!
- “Greece in summer? More like a meltdown of overrated ruins and scorching sunburns.”
- “Planning a summer trip to Greece? Enjoy the overcrowded beaches and a side of historical heatstroke.”
17. Call them lazy at any given opportunity
Greeks have a Hercules-like work ethic (so they argue) even when they focus more and leisure. They’re as serious about enjoying life as they are about their tzatziki.
They’ll hit back with retorts sharper than a feta knife if you call them lazy because of that. So, unless you want verbal souvlaki skewering, it’s best to steer clear of reaching a Greek person.
They’ll defend their lively lifestyle.
- “If laziness were an Olympic sport, you’d be bringing home the gold for Greece!”
18. Hand them a fortune cookie, claiming it’s from the Oracle of Delphi
Handing a Greek person a fortune cookie while claiming it’s from the Oracle of Delphi will make them feel like you’re making fun of their deep history and wisdom by reducing it to something as simple and casual as a fortune cookie.
So, giving them a fortune cookie as if it’s a profound oracle would likely come off as a playful jab, unintentionally poking fun at their rich cultural heritage.
- “Here’s your personalized message from the Oracle of Delphi 2.0 – now with extra crunch and a side of ancient wisdom-lite!”
- “I asked the Oracle for your fortune, but all I got was this cookie. I guess even destiny takes shortcuts these days!”
19. Sprinkle gyro-related puns into your conversation
Using gyro-related puns with a Greek person can feel disrespectful to them, like making light of something they hold dear.
This could make them feel annoyed or frustrated, thinking you’re not taking something vital to them seriously. This is how it sounds like:
- “You’re gyro-ing to be successful.”
- “Don’t be such a gyro-scope!
20. Send them texts filled with emojis representing Greek mythology
Think of it as sending a text that seems funny to you but could be seen as making fun of their cultural roots.
- Sending a bunch of Zeus emojis and texting, “Feeling electrifying today?”
- Sending Medusa emojis with a caption like, “Bad hair day?”