20 Funny Roasts For An iPhone User

Approximately 18.55 percent of phone users in the world use iPhones. That’s a lot. 

Almost everyone(who doesn’t use iPhones) knows someone who uses an iPhone.  

What do we do about these pompous folks? We roast them!

This article contains 20 funny roasts designed to expose those iPhone users around you. Puns, comparisons, sarcasms. You name it. 

Let no iPhone user shame your android phones again. Here we go. 

Dig in. 

20 Funny Roasts For An iPhone User

1. Why did the iPhone user go to therapy?

Funny Roasts For An iPhone User

Sincerely, iPhone users need to check into therapy. Perhaps they can learn inclusion, everything the iPhone lacks.

Outwardly, they brag about their phones thinking it’s a flex, but inwardly, they bemoan their restrictive iTunes and iCloud. In this roast the iPhone and the owner are one and the same. They both need therapy. 

  • An iPhone user decided he needed therapy because he couldn’t handle all the emotional baggage in his storage.


  • I asked Siri why an iPhone user was in therapy, and she said she was trying to process its feelings.

2. How does an iPhone user apologize?

He says, “I’m app-solutely sorry!” 

Because come to think of all the apps they miss out on. Yet iPhone users go about thinking they are in some exclusive club with special benefits for members.

No, iPhone users. Y’all are not that people. iPhone users suffer from autocorrect issues too, don’t they? You’d think Apple would do something about that. 

  • An iPhone user apologized for autocorrecting “morning” to “moaning.” It was appalled!


  • When my iPhone accidentally called my boss, it sent an apology text saying: I’m sorry, I butt-dialed, it wasn’t intentional – it was just a touchy situation.

3. What did one iPhone user say to the other in a bar?

“You’re not syncing straight!”

iPhone users have all these syncing going on when they need to transfer data from one phone to the other. This roast plays on this hassle.

An android phone has all these amazing stuff: music, movies, games, awesome apps. Yet they can’t share with an iPhone? What a miserable life for iPhone users. 

  • I overheard an iPhone user telling another one: You need to sync up your life – it’s a mess!


  • Two iPhone users walked into a bar, and one said to the other: I think we should sync up, maybe then our owners will get their lives together.

4. Why did the iPhone user apply for a job?

He wanted a stable connection and a better ‘cell’ary life. The play here is on the exclusivity of iPhones and the challenge it places on users.

Do users mind? No, they don’t. In fact, they thrive on this exclusivity of iPhones. This joke plays on apps, suggesting that iPhone users live lavishly. 

  • This iPhone user applied for a job as a receptionist because it thought it could handle multiple calls at once.


  • I asked this iPhone user why she wanted a job, and it said it needed to support its app-solutely lavish lifestyle.

5. What do you call a group of musical iPhones?

An iOrchestra! 

This roast makes fun of the exclusivity of iOS, the operating system of iPhones. It says everything users do is controlled by the operating system of their phones.

In this case, when they get together to play musical instruments, it’s not an orchestra. 

  • I went to a concert where iPhones were playing classical music. It was an iOrchestra, and they were app-lause-worthy!


  • My iPhone started playing piano, and suddenly, all the other iPhones joined in – it was an impromptu iOrchestra.

6. Why did the iPhone break up with its charger?

It felt like the relationship was getting too charged! 

Still on the matter of iPhone exclusivity. This roast makes fun of how iPhone chargers are exclusive to the phone.

What happens here is the phone and charger breakups. This is what happens when iPhone chargers pack up, they are unable to use a random charger. 

  • My iPhone told me it broke up with its charger because it needed space to recharge emotionally.


  • I caught my iPhone looking for a new charger online, saying it wanted a less electrifying relationship.

7. What do you call an iPhone user that sings?

A melodious ringtone! This roast says an iPhone user is not a musician if he sings. He’s a melodious ringtone.

Android phones have better ringtones than iPhones, and this is where the humor of this joke comes from. 

  • My iPhone started singing in the middle of a meeting, and everyone thought it was just updating its ringtone to be more melodious.


  • I asked Siri if my iPhone could sing, and she replied: Oh yes, it’s a real ringtone sensation!

8. How does an iPhone say goodbye?

It sends a text: “iGoodbye!”

This roast makes fun of the i in iPhone. It says that everything an iPhone does comes with an i. Even greeting goodbye.

To make it worse, this roast says after an upgrade the iPhone bids it’s user farewell. This particular joke is a fun roast. 

  • When I upgraded my iPhone, it sent a text saying: It’s time for an iGoodbye, old friend!


  • My friend’s iPhone got replaced, and it sent a farewell text: iGoodbye, it’s been an app-solute pleasure being in your pocket.

9. Why did the iPhone go to school?

It wanted to be smarter than a smartphone! 

Because come to think of it: how’s a phone with the exclusivity that the iPhone has, a smart phone? Begin this roast by pointing this important fact out.

Then hit them with the roast properly. As shown in the examples below. 

  • My iPhone enrolled in a coding class, saying it wanted to be more than just a pretty interface.


  • I found my iPhone reading a book on quantum physics, claiming it needed to keep up with the latest tech trends.

10. What’s an iPhone user’s favorite exercise?

App-solutely push-ups! This roast makes fun of an iPhone’s user’s need to handle app updates. This roast is playful. It roasts both the phone and user.

Admittedly, non iPhone users also go through the hassle of app upgrades.

  • I caught my iPhone doing push-ups on the table, claiming it needed to stay in shape to handle all those app updates.


  • Siri told me my iPhone was at the gym, doing app-solutely push-ups to stay fit for multitasking.

11. Why did the iPhone user break up with the calendar app?

It felt the relationship was too date-centric! 

A new iPhone is released every year. So you’d wonder why the iPhone user would have an issue with the calendar. Maybe they can’t wait to see a new iPhone released.

One that isn’t different from the former one in no particular way. In this roast the iPhone user broke up with his calendar: there is wordplay on dates. And being date-focused is a reference to iPhone releases. 

  • My iPhone told me it broke up with the calendar app because it needed some space between dates.


  • I caught my iPhone swiping left on the calendar app, saying it was tired of being so date-focused.

12. How does an iPhone user answer a philosophical question?

It says, I think, therefore I app.

This roast suggests that the iPhone user is dependent on his phone too much. This is true because the iPhone is a lifestyle phone.

Unlike most Android phones. If asked an existential question the iPhone user is unable to give an answer without involving his beloved phone. 

  • I asked Siri a deep question, and she replied: I think, therefore I app – it’s the existential way.


  • My iPhone gave me a philosophical answer, claiming its existence was justified by its ability to app-solutely think.

13. What’s an iPhone user’s favorite dance move?

The sync-and-shuffle!

The next iOS update is going to require a party. For this reason iPhone users must learn a dance move. We’ve all witnessed the hype that usually surrounds the release of a new iPhone.

When delivering this roast, include this important information. 

  • I caught my iPhone dancing on the table, claiming it was practicing the sync-and-shuffle for the next iOS update party.


  • Siri told me my iPhone was in the living room, perfecting its sync-and-shuffle routine to impress other devices.

14. Why did the iPhone user start a comedy club?

He wanted to share his app-licable sense of humor!

Use this roast if you know an iPhone user who picked up standup comedy as a profession. This roast connects the decision to his iPhone.

The humor plays on the common who shared by iPhone users. Those people have a too high estimation of their apps. It’s all tied to their exclusivity. 

  • An iPhone user announced he was starting a comedy club because he needed a platform to share his app-solutely hilarious jokes.


  • Siri told me my iPhone was on stage, delivering app-licable jokes to a laughing audience at its comedy club.

15. What do you call an iPhone in stealth mode?

An iNinja!

This joke makes reference to the regular stealth mode in all smart phones. For the purpose of the roast, a humorous distinction is made for iPhone users.

Begin this roast by letting your audience know iPhones and their users like to think they’re better and different. For this reason Siri may have the ability to whisper. 

  • Siri whispered that my iPhone was in iNinja mode, hiding from unwanted notifications.

16. Why did the iPhone user apply for a job at Amazon?

She heard they were looking for a “smart”phone! 

Here goes the spotlight on the egos of iPhone users again. In this roast the humor is in the iPhone users’ reason for applying to work at Amazon.

He probably got his smartphone from there, so why not? The roast attacks the iPhone users’ self importance. 

  • My iPhone got a job at Amazon, claiming it was the “smart” choice for handling orders and keeping things organized.

17. What’s an iPhone’s favorite movie genre?

Rom-coms – romantic comedies! 

This roast is a proper diss at iPhone users. This is to let the world know iPhone users are a bunch of ladies who spend their time watching romantic comedies.

There’s nothing heroic in the iPhone lifestyle. Sorry to disappoint you. 

  • I caught my iPhone watching a romantic comedy, claiming it needed some love in its life.


  • Siri suggested a list of rom-coms for my iPhone, saying it needed a good laugh and a touch of romance.

18. Why did the iPhone join a band?

Funny Roasts For An iPhone User

It wanted to be in sync with the music scene!

There’s not much to explain here. The iPhone joins a band, out of a knack for musical harmony. It seems that’s all an iPhone is good for.

Compare this with an android smartphone with the gazillion apps available on it and you see the humor in joining a band. 

  • My iPhone joined a band, saying it wanted to be in sync with the rhythm of the tech world.


  • Siri mentioned my iPhone was practicing with a band, claiming it had an app-solute knack for musical harmony.

19. How does an iPhone organize a party?

It creates a “sync-tastic” playlist!

There’s a play on the words sync and fantastic in this roast. Once again this is a diss at iPhone users.

When an iPhone tries to take over a party you wonder if the music on iTunes is sufficient. Of course expect iPhone users to swear it’s enough. 

  • My iPhone took over party planning, ensuring the playlist was sync-tastic for a night of app-solute fun.


  • Siri suggested my iPhone as the DJ for the party, boasting about its ability to curate a sync-tastic atmosphere.

20. What’s an iPhone user’s favorite outdoor activity?

App-le picking!

The humor here is in the suggestion that an Apple user loves working in an orchard. Is there an affinity between iPhone users and apples? Apparently. 

There’s also a play on app and Apple

  • I found an iPhone user browsing through orchards, claiming he needed some fresh air and a break from app-le updates.


  • Siri told me my iPhone was on a hiking trip, enjoying some app-le picking along the way.

Final Thoughts

The debate between who’s better phone, iPhones or android, rages on. When you want to or not, you are caught in a lifestyle battle with iPhone users. 

Arm yourself with these roasts. Next time you meet an iPhone user, know that you fight for the honor of non iPhone users. 


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