In whatever you do, please avoid Liverpool fans. Those guys are bittered and are going through a lot worse than a breakup.
I’ve done my research thoroughly and I can tell you that just saying to Liverpool fans “Up Liverpool” or “You will never walk alone” can make them go berserk.
You will wonder why just a greeting can upset them. Well, that is because as opposed to their slogan, they have been walking alone; with no trophies to show for years.
So if you are a Liverpool fan, these humour streaks might stab you or make you red however, you do know that this is all for fun, and you are loved.
If so, then let’s get the fun rolling on 15 Funny Roasts for Liverpool fans.
Here are 15 Funny Roasts for Liverpool Fans
- On our way to success, may Liverpool never happen to us.
- Liverpool has more models than players.
- Liverpool players are sadists. They are used to failures.
- Need an understanding boyfriend? Get you a Liverpool boyfriend.
- Jurgen Klopp even with glasses can’t see Liverpool winning a trophy in EPL.
- With so many trophyless seasons the liver bird on the Liverpool logo is about to starve to death.
- Virgil Van Dijk can save his hair, not the goalkeeper.
- Liverpool players are paid not to leave, and not to win.
- “We will never walk alone” but Liverpool fans have been walking.
- My brother asked me to put all the trash into the bin and I threw his Liverpool Jersey in the bin.
- How do Liverpool fans fix a faulty light bulb? They don’t, they just talk about how good the old one was.
- Which ship never docked at Liverpool? “The Premiership”
- What’s always on its way but never arrives? Liverpool’s year.
- Waiting for Liverpool to win the league is like waiting for “Tomorrow”- It is always coming but never arrives.
- Since Liverpool last won the League; Scholes made his debut, won it 12 times, retired, then came out of retirement, won it again, and then retired.
1. On our way to success, may Liverpool never happen to us.
Take a subtle jab at the team’s failed attempt to win the premier league with these piercing words. The Liverpool club is a hell of a joke.
Liverpool Club will make a lot of noise but head at nothing at the end. They strive to win the league and score more goals but bring no trophy home.
Their fans are always the most expectant in that period only for them to bottle the league; losing to the champion with few points.
What other better way to describe futile endeavors than this? So, that brings us to the idea of this roast.
This roast uses prayer to ridicule and make jest of a Liverpool fan. Tell this roast to a Liverpool fan who is your friend, and watch him red like the color of his club.
- In each of our endeavors, may we not encounter Liverpool
- On the verge of breaking through, may we not experience Liverpool.
2. Liverpool has more models than players
Tease them with their weakness; inability to come up with good players. Have you seen Liverpool players on set? Oh! These guys are hot. From Virgil Van Dijik to Alisson Becker and even Mo. Salah.
Google ranked them as the top five sexiest players.
But do you know the joke; they are only the finest players on the field; hot but not hot enough to win a trophy for their team.
Give a Liverpool fan an unsolicited advice with this roast by saying:
- I think your top players will do more as models and brand ambassadors than being footballers.
- A piece of advice for you; tell Virgil Van Dijik to consider having Only Fans. He will strike more on the other field than when he is on the football field.
3. Liverpool fans are sadists. They are used to failures.
Poke at a Liverpool frustration that is etched out of constant disappointments.
I’m not a Liverpool fan but I can assure you that these guys are far from being happy. They are broken like their team, used to scoring many goals only to bottle the league.
These guys might need therapy but sadly enough a win is all they need to stay alive, and a win is too bleak to envision.
- Liverpool fans- sadist in one word.
- Describe failure in one word- Liverpool.
4. Need an understanding boyfriend? Get you a Liverpool boyfriend.
I’m not kidding but truth be told, the level of patience Liverpool fans have needs to be studied. How can you be so loyal to a loser of a club for many years? That’s hilarious.
Use these lines to roast your friend who is a Liverpool fan. It’s more interesting when you are at a party and you guys are about four and with a girl telling you she needs a good man in her life.
Don’t let it go cold, aim a hot jab at your friend who is a Liverpool fan with this roast;
- Julie, date a Liverpool fan. They don’t ”beat” anyone.
- If you need an understanding boyfriend Liverpool fans are typical examples of one. Their club has groomed them well.
5. Jurgen Klopp even with glasses can’t see Liverpool winning a trophy in EPL.
A sharp hit on the Liverpool coach. Here is another hilarious roast for Liverpool fans. Use this statement to open fresh wounds for Liverpool fans and watch them get roasted like a chicken.
This roast makes jest of their coach having two pairs of eyes and still can’t envision Liverpool winning a trophy in the coming EPL.
Shame on Liverpool, they couldn’t knock Man City out of this title race before KDB came back from injury. And now Kevin De Bruyne is back.
Even Jurgen Klopp admitted publicly that everyone is shaking ahead of Kevin De Bruyne’s imminent return from injury for Manchester City. So no hope. What a joke!
Roast a Liverpool fan this way;
- Even with Klopp’s glasses, he has no vision of when Liverpool will score.
- Klopp still lacks foresight even with his four eyes.
6. With so many trophyless seasons the liver bird on the Liverpool logo is about to starve to death.
You know there is a picture that went around some time ago; it shows a sword aimed at the liver bird.
Now make a light joke that the trophyless seasons can make the liver bird on the Liverpool logo starve to death.
This is a painful joke to make about Liverpool, that will make Liverpool fans go wild.
- Even if winning is hard to come by, at least for the sake of the liver bird, win a trophy.
- The Liver bird is starving to death because your club refused to give it a trophy.
7. Virgil Van Dijk can save his hair, not the goalkeeper.
Another roast for ‘The Reds’ sexiest players, and of course their loyal fans.
This roast draws humor from the fact that Dijk put so much effort into taking care of his hair; never has he worn rough hair.
So the idea is that if Dijk can exert this same effort into defending balls, perhaps other teams scoring goals from them won’t be a walk in the park.
Get under the skin of Liverpool fans with this roast:
- Hey, wanted to know which one Virgil Van Dijk saves better; his hair or the goalkeeper?
8. Liverpool players are paid not to leave, and not to win.
This is yet another subtle joke on the Liverpool team.
It is a joke on Liverpool’s failure as a team and further makes humor about the fact that they were possibly paid to remain in the club and not necessarily win so they could have more men in the dressing room.
It’s a light-hearted roast you have there but the ability to make a Liverpool fan burn can’t be underestimated.
- Liverpool players are paid to stay so they can have more models in the dressing room.
- Expect less from Liverpool players; they weren’t paid to win.
9. We will never walk alone” but Liverpool fans have been walking alone in The Merseyside Derbys for only God knows years
This roast makes use of sarcasm to ridicule the Liverpool logo. It states that ” we will never walk alone” but have been doing the exact opposite for a long period of time now.
In fact, Liverpool doesn’t hold a record anymore- keeping a good track of good wins because whatever was won in the past is now a grand history.
Use this roast for a Liverpool fan when next their anthem pops up and a fan is gingerly singing along. I bet he will have no choice but to keep quiet.
- Liverpool doing the exact opposite of what their slogan says got to be the greatest joke of all time.
- Seen any Liverpool fans before? They are the loneliest people living.
10. My brother asked me to put the trash into the bin and I threw his Liverpool Jersey in the bin.
Step on your brother’s ego in a light-hearted manner using this roast.
If you want to tell your brother their club is a pile of shit but you don’t want to say it directly, then this roast is for you.
This roast is capable of stinging him and every other Liverpool fan. But be sure you don’t belong to clubs like Arsenal, or else you are staging yourself for an inescapable roast.
This roast is too brutal and will surely draw reactions from your brother who is a Liverpool fan.
- I was told to dispose the garbage and I disposed my brother’s Liverpool Jersey.
11. How do Liverpool fans fix a faulty light bulb? They don’t, they just talk about how good the old one was.
A funny roast for Liverpool fans. Engage Liverpool fans in a conversation and all they will ever tell you are past events of when their club made the highlights.
Liverpool fans live more in the past than in the moment, because at the moment there’s no tangible achievement to back the story up.
So humorously, this roast makes jest of Liverpool’s outdated achievements to poke fun at the fans’ other aspects of their life.
- What did a Liverpool fan say when you asked for suggestions on how to fix the faucet; he said, “Oh! I remember how good the old one was.”
- How do Liverpool win? They dream about it.
12. Which ship never docked at Liverpool? “The Premiership”
This is a play on word to make jest of Liverpool’s constant losses in the Premiership league.
I tell you Liverpool is famous for losing in the Premiership league. Use this riddle to make fun of Liverpool fans. He understands the jokes so expect him to be a little bit angry.
Make a Liverpool fan itchy with this roast:
- Which ship never made it to the shores of Liverpool? “The Premiership”.
13. What’s always on its way but never arrives? Liverpool’s year.
Another riddle to ridicule a Liverpool fan. There is always noise about them doing better in the next match but at the end throw their loyal fans in the fan.
This is a witty post that simply portrays the impossibility of Liverpool’s chance of winning the league in every season.
A good troll for them, right? Yeah. I agree.
- Describe impossibility in two words; Liverpool’s Year
14. Waiting for Liverpool to win the league is like waiting for “Tomorrow”- It is always coming but never arrives.
Another roast for the already frustrated Liverpool fans. Here, you are not just making fun of the team but you are even tired of making fun of them and emphasizing that they are a catastrophe.
- Waiting for Liverpool to win the League is like waiting for rapture. Nobody knows when and how.
15. Since Liverpool last won the League; Scholes made his debut, won it 12 times, retired, then came out of retirement, won it again, and then retired.
By now a Liverpool fan is boiling with revenge. Increase the heat with this last roast. I can tell you my Grandpa was still alive the last time Liverpool won the League.
It’s been four years since he died and Liverpool’s yet to win either the UCL or the EPL.
So make jest of Liverpool team in the presence of their team in a sarcastic way;
- Since Liverpool last won the English League; Tom Cleverly, Shinji Kagawa, Danny Welbeck, Javier Hernandez, and Alexander Buttner have all been born, raised, joined Manchester United, won the league, and even left the club.